International Men’s Day 2019

Today is INTERNATIONAL MEN’S DAY. ♂️♂️

I wrote Invisible Boys because I wanted to show the world that boys and men suffer, and how our suffering shows up in various ways.

Sometimes our suffering makes us small and quiet and self-loathing, like Zeke.

Sometimes it makes us angry and confrontational, like Charlie.

Sometimes it just makes us seem like arrogant “dickheads”, as many people have described Hammer.

In almost all cases, however, men and boys suffer with one almost universal commonality: we usually do it in silence.

This silence is killing us. Suicide is the biggest killer of men under 40. We’re taking our own lives at a rate TRIPLE that of females, and this stat has not budged for AGES.

We don’t open up and say how we’re feeling, and I am convinced, in my bones, that if we gave ourselves permission to be vulnerable, and boldly tackle what’s going on inside, we would help ourselves to suffer less.

I believe developing the muscles required to be vulnerable makes a man more masculine, not less. The willingness to bare our souls, to face what is within us – whether virtue or demon – makes us braver and stronger and more assertive and more powerful. And yep, more manly. 💪💪

So today let’s acknowledge that the struggle is real for men and boys all across this fucked-up planet – not just gay guys, but all guys.

And in all the earnestness of this post, let’s not forget that today really ought to be a celebration of men and our awesomeness, not just a lamenting of our issues.

So here’s to all the legendary blokes out there, being heroes and lovers and fathers and sons and brothers and soldiers and healers and leaders and artists and sportsmen and dreamers. Here’s to the blokes who are tough as nails and those who are gentle as a feather. Here’s to the slack and the ambitious, the pristine and the traumatised, the stoic and the empathetic, the passionate and the larrikin.

Here’s to us men, being what proud of what we are and working hard at what we could become. 💪💪

Holden